Find It

By Jayden Kyryluk

We all want something. Good health, money, romance, adventure, a raise…it’s natural for us to want something we don’t have. We are animals after all; we look to the world for gratification.

But why are the rich unhappy? Why do attractive people get depressed? Why does the fulfilment of love often flutter over time? What is the disconnect?

Nothing lasts forever, and we know that. Whether we admit it or not, when we get what we want, we know it won’t last, and we look for something new as soon as we get it. It’s as if our desire for something is the thread that holds us to who we think we are. If that thread snaps, we lose ourselves. We’re always trying to keep that thread from breaking, asking, “what’s next?”

Round and round we go, telling ourselves, “this is it,” and “now I will be happy, now I am fulfilled.” When you get what you want, how do you feel? Great right? But for how long? How long until that new car or accomplishment brings you energy and fulfills your purpose? These things are nice; they push us and give us something to strive for, but how long until they just become another event that happened or a thing that you have? Do you remember what you got on your birthday five years ago? Do you care about that mark you stressed so much about in high school? All things fade with the winds of time. At some point, you might reach a place where it just doesn’t do it for you anymore.

You’ll ask yourself, “there must be more, right?”

You’ve forgotten where you come from. You’ve forgotten that childlike feeling within you where nothing matters but what’s in front of your eyes at this very moment. You’ve forgotten what it feels like to be connected to the universe in harmony, to be at one with it all. You've forgotten it completely.

That’s all mystic hogwash anyway. Only hippies or monks in mountains worry about this stuff. The only problem is when your new car breaks down, relationship falls apart, and the things you’ve made who you are fall away with the wind. Your only predicament is that it all ends with time. Desire, acquisition, and dissatisfaction are cyclical reflections of the transient nature of external sources of happiness.

Ah, so. What now? I got my car, new house, a great relationship and a happy life.

What now?

When we want something, we are scared we won’t get it. When we have something, we are scared to lose it. No matter the case, it ends in loss. The kernel within all our wants is fear. I’m scared to lose my car, house, relationship, and happiness by default; simply for the reason that I have them. That is why we can never be fulfilled no matter how many desires we realize. External achievements and possessions may provide temporary satisfaction, but they often don't offer lasting contentment because all of our desires are wrapped with fear. If none of this lasts, what does? What's beneath it all?

That’s for you to find out.

There is one thing that never dies, one thing that is eternal. You can find that thing with the mirror of the soul. What is the most meaningful thing in your entire life? When you close your eyes, take a deep breath, forget your worries and seek presence, what comes to mind? The essence of that is who you are. The essence of that is what transcends your desires.

We must answer the call from within to forget our worries, time, and our carefully constructed identity we carry with us. In these moments of connection with the mirror of the soul, we can transcend the limitations of the ego and experience a deeper, more authentic sense of self.

The journey inward, towards self-awareness and connection with something greater, is a path to a more enduring and profound sense of fulfillment. We will never be fulfilled as long as we chase what we can lose, but what is already within you cannot be lost.

Find it.